June 22, 1973In which I agonize some more

"Sweet sixteen and never been kissed". Isn't that what I said? Didn't I make a vow to myself to be kissed before I turned seventeen? And didn't I pledge that I would kiss Bob? His mouth was just right, I could imagine his face getting closer, closer...

But -- I do not realize that another life is involved, a person who can get hurt. My emotions after I met Bob are in the way too. I am not mentally attracted to him much at all -- only physically. The fact that he is a male and I a female set off a certain feeling. That he is attracted to me (I know not how) is even more -- well, I guess the word is - excites me.

It is hard to wrote about. I do not understand my feelings. I have tried to tell Bob how I feel -- he has asked me to go steady twice. And I am upset every time I try to explain my feelings.

Note:

It looks as if I had a one track mind back then - I just wanted to be kissed before my 17^th birthday which was only two months away. Again I really don't remember all this agonizing.

Oh, interesting to note the date here - I was married exactly 12 years later.